Deterring Bliss - 8/13/2009

I make piss-poor analogies, but that doesn't stop me from trying...and as I haven't updated in a month, I figured why not take another crack at one?  Sometimes I hear really great music at my work.  It happens very seldom, but sometimes one of my favorite songs will come on.  And I'll usually be like C'MON!!!  I don't wanna listen to music I adore while working at a place I disdain.  It takes away from the power of the song.  The energy is diminished, and it feels like it lessens the impact of how transcendent the music would otherwise be in an environment I preferred.  But occasionally I throw myself into the song simply because it's on and I LOVE it...and I'm like, what the hell, why not? 

Well, UNDOUBTEDLY, my song will be interrupted by some asshole paging another person on the intercom for god knows what reason.  And this happens time and time again, usually only during songs that I ENJOY!!!  And so I've learned to instinctively tune out the music I love because I know it will invariably be interrupted by loud-ass irritating voices making announcements on the god damn intercom. 

Maybe that's like life.  Our greatest joys, our biggest pleasures....are mitigated by our unconscious because we know that, in life, something will always FUCK IT UP, or make it less wonderful somehow.  It won't live up to our expectations, or something will come crashing down, and our happiness will ultimately turn into frustration.  So we don't allow ourselves to feel our passions fully, to embrace our ecstasy completely, and to live our loves unconditionally.  We know that we'll always be let down somehow, so we keep invisible walls around us which both protects us from disappointment but also keeps us from truly feeling our emotions.

It's fear, of course.  Fear which we willingly accept and in fact create in order to keep unwanted experiences at bay.  But rarely do we realize that our vanguards are seldom serving us as much as they are preventing us from living freely within our own beings. 

I guess my point is that we have to relinquish this safety-mechanism that we've employed in our subconscious, because bad stuff is gonna happen regardless of whether or not we construct deterrents to pain in our behaviors.  Since things will go wrong despite our precautions, we might as well let down our guard and embrace things as they are...so that when bliss presents itself in our lives, we can really FEEL it and appreciate it's beauty, it's rarity, and thus it's significance.